Thursday, June 17, 2010

Creating my ideal body - the first steps

Last August, 2009, I made a decision that I was going to feel better about my body.

In the process of having two babies, I had gained a lot of weight on my already less-than-in-shape body.  It was depressing to get dressed, my feet hurt so bad I could barely walk barefoot, and my blood pressure was high.  And my babies weren't babies any longer.  I was wearing a size 24, and even some of those were getting tight.

Because of my history of dieting, and low self-esteem in general, I was completely unwilling to go on a diet and restrict my calories, or, god forbid, keep a food journal, or do weekly weigh-ins.  lol  I have done all those things in the past, and I hated it.

It didn't matter how much I knew that to lose weight I had to diet and exercise.  I was NOT going to do it that way ever again.

In determining the path I was going to take, I tapped and meditated.  What I learned was that what I really wanted was to feel comfortable and happy in my own skin.  My number that came up on the scale really didn't matter.  What mattered to me was:

  • that I felt good in my clothes
  • that I was able to shop in "normal" sizes instead of specialty plus sizes
  • that my feet didn't hurt
  • that the doctor and dentist weren't bugging me about my blood pressure
  • that my husband thought I was sexy
  • that I stayed alive to raise my kids
The first thing I did was to get rid of all my clothes that made me feel frumpy and fat.  It was easy to pick out the couple of items that I wore and felt pretty good in.  The clothes that fit, didn't have holes or stains,  and made me feel good were few....it left me with about 3 outfits.  Everything else got bagged up and I drove it to the donation box.

When you have nothing to wear and your closet is literally empty, there's some strong motivation to get some new clothes.  We were a single income family at the time, and we didn't have ANY budget for new clothes, so I went to the thrift store.  For about $60 I bought myself a slightly used wardrobe that made me feel comfortable AND beautiful.

Mostly I found long skirts and dresses, this was a fall wardrobe, nothing tight around my stomach, and long enough that I could wear socks instead of hose.  I shunned all the jeans and most of the pants in general.  My husband had admitted to me that he thought I looked better in skirts and besides, my jeans were the first thing to squeeze me and make me feel fat.  Basically, my wardrobe went from frumpy stay-at-home mom to business casual.

The energy shift was amazing!   Suddenly, people were complimenting me everywhere I went.  Suddenly, I didn't feel the stress of getting dressed in the morning. People wondered why I was dressed up all the time.  

The next step was to go back to practicing yoga.  







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